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vain_gloriousPart 1 for header info
Two days after the meeting with Landry about the message from the Apollo, Sheppard and Teyla were called to another meeting. This one was in the debriefing room rather than Landry’s office, though. And when they arrived, McKay and SG-1 minus Teal’c were already seated at the conference table.
Landry wasn’t there yet. Sheppard took a seat and Teyla pulled out the chair next to him.
“Got it to work?” he said, mildly to McKay, across the table.
McKay blinked at him. “Of course I did.”
“How long ago?” Sheppard asked, since he assumed they probably hadn’t deemed to share it with him.
“A while,” Carter answered, honestly. “Daniel’s been working on the translation until now.”
“I miss any other meetings?” Sheppard inquired, suspiciously.
“No,” Mitchell said. “Don’t be so paranoid.”
But Vala spilled for him. “Just the one,” she promised. “Where McKay and Sam fought over who actually fixed it.”
Carter glared at her, while McKay rolled his eyes.
Landry arrived then. He glanced around as he took a seat at the head of the table. “Begin without me?” he asked.
“No, sir,” answered Carter. “Just saying hello.”
Landry nodded his forgiveness. “Very well. Dr. Jackson, why don’t you begin?”
“I’m sorry, I guess Dr. McKay would like to go first,” he said.
“He might,” Landry agreed, lightly. “But I asked you to speak, not him.”
McKay scowled, but
“Alright,” he said, passing out thin manila folders to everyone seated. “I’ll get straight to the point. “Does everyone remember the quantum mirror we recovered several years ago?”
“No,” said Sheppard, flatly.
“Right,”
“Alternate universes,” Sheppard repeated.
“We never determined the origin of the quantum mirror,”
“John’s memories are of a parallel universe’s experience?” Teyla asked, cutting to the chase.
“None of it relevant,” McKay interrupted. He looked at Landry. “You wanted to know why they built this thing? So they could stick their noses in parallel universes without any of the complications of actually messing with quantum travel. Laziness.”
“Or efficiency,” Carter interjected. “We know from experience how bizarre it can be to have, um, doppelgangers pop up from parallel universes.”
“Bizarre,” Landry said, “As well as dangerous.”
“I think it sounds fun,” Vala said, thoughtfully.
“You aren’t going near that thing,”
“Anyway,” Carter said, loudly. “We’re assuming that the purpose of this device was to harvest information about events in parallel universes without going through all the trouble of –”
“Talking to people,” McKay interrupted, “Which I understand.”
“- of having to tell the residents of that universe where you came from, convincing them to believe you, identifying key differences that separate the realities, determining their usefulness,” Carter continued. “Not to mention the technical complications, like temporal distortion.”
“So rather than go through all that,” Mitchell said. “They built a machine to download someone’s brain –” he paused, and made a face at the thought – “from that parallel universe?”
“Simplistic,” McKay said, “but, yeah.”
“Wait a second,” Sheppard said, unable to keep quiet. “This is better? I thought I was crazy! And so did everyone else!”
“You used it wrong,” McKay snapped.
There was silence for a second, until Carter tentatively agreed with McKay.
“Well,” she said. “We’re assuming that if someone activated this device, they’re expecting to have their memories altered. And that, afterwards, they’d be able and willing to share whatever information they were after in the first place.”
“You fell on it,” Vala said, unhelpfully.
“What about his original memories?” Teyla spoke up, pointedly. “How can we recover those?”
“We can’t,” McKay said, bluntly. “He broke it.”
“What?” asked Landry,
“I’ve only been able to access about half of the instructions,”
“Hey!” McKay yelled.
“We don’t know that the memories were ever intended to be recovered,” Carter spoke up. “It’s possible that they weren’t. It might have been a known sacrifice of using the device.”
Teyla was looking at the tabletop, her face pursed unhappily.
“You said you don’t know,” Sheppard prompted.
“We don’t,”
“There’s a lot we don’t know,” Carter continued. “For example, why five years appears to be the time frame it was set for. Alternate universes can diverge at any point, one year, ten years, one million years. You’d never be able to determine the point of divergence. Five years is a shot in the dark.”
“Or what happened to the individual whose memories are harvested,”
“I am the John Sheppard from the universe I remember,” Sheppard snapped.
“Yeah.”
Sheppard knew exactly what that was like. He didn’t have to imagine anything.
“Have you tested it?” Sheppard asked.
“No,” Landry said, sharply. “I was very clear about that.”
“You tested it,” Vala muttered. “I don’t think we’ll be doing that again.”
“What I’d like to know,” McKay said, “is why the hell the Ancients would build a device like this. It’s half-brilliant, half-ridiculous.”
“Sounds like them,” Sheppard murmured. He met Rodney’s eyes. “They didn’t always act as a unit and some of their scientists were fucking insane.”
He’d just cursed in front of Landry, but he didn’t really care.
“Perhaps it was a simple matter of using the device twice,” Teyla spoke up, voice hopeful. “Once to ‘harvest’ the memories, as you say, and once to return the user’s original experiences.”
“There’s nothing to support that idea, Teyla,” Carter said, gently.
“I wouldn’t stick my brain in there,” McKay announced. “His brain,” he glanced at Sheppard. “Maybe.”
“The power distribution system is severely damaged,” Carter said. “It’s producing constant low-grade electrical shocks just from being turned on. I’d be very afraid that actually activating it would electrocute anyone touching it, rather than anything else.”
“Oh,” Teyla said, softly.
“Anything else?” Landry asked.
“No,”
“There’s no chance,” Sheppard began. He paused. “No chance you can fix it?”
“Of course I could fix it,” McKay said. “Eventually. But we still wouldn’t know how it works and they aren’t going to let you stick your head in it to see.”
“He’s correct, Colonel,” Landry said. “From what I can tell, this is a dangerous piece of equipment that should probably be destroyed before it accidentally does something to someone else.” He was looking sympathetically but seriously at Sheppard.
“Also,” McKay muttered. “I don’t work here anymore.” He smirked.
“I appreciate your hard work on this matter. You’re all dismissed,” Landry said. “Especially you, Dr. McKay.”
McKay made a face, already rising.
Sheppard stayed seated with Teyla, sensing Landry had something further to say.
The General did, but it didn’t really change anything.
“I’m sorry,” Landry said. “I understand that this must still be difficult for you, but I hope these answers help.”
“They do,” Teyla said, somewhat sincerely.
Sheppard just nodded.
"I'll let you have some time to think this over," Landry continued, generously.
“I’m gonna go say goodbye to McKay,” Sheppard said, rising.
Landry grinned. “You can escort him out of the building,” he agreed.
~
Sheppard caught up with McKay at the elevators. For pretending to be so eager to leave, the man was taking his sweet time finding his way out.
“Hey,” Sheppard said, coming up to him.
McKay glared at him. “What do you want?”
“I’m escorting you out of the building,” Sheppard fell back on.
McKay sneered. “Gonna search me?”
“No,” Sheppard said, as the elevator arrived and they both entered. “Why, did you steal something to give to the Russians?”
“Just my brain,” McKay said, smirking.
The elevator doors closed and the car began the long climb to the surface. Sheppard didn’t say anything, just watched the numbers above the doors light up one after another.
“Why do you keep bothering me?” McKay demanded, after a few seconds of silence. “You had Carter pester me, you showed up at a physics conference to harass me, and Carter said it was your idea to bring me in on this.”
“I’m from an alternate universe,” Sheppard told him, shrugging.
“Parallel universe,” McKay corrected.
“We were friends,” Sheppard said. “There.”
McKay snorted. “Really.”
“Yeah,” Sheppard said, ignoring the man’s disbelief. “On Atlantis.”
For a moment, McKay didn’t say anything. He seemed to be trying to keep from saying something. And not surprisingly, he failed.
“The Russians have a mission to Pegasus,” he said. “We’re going to find Atlantis.”
Sheppard tried not to show much reaction. “That why you’re going to
McKay nodded. “Well, mostly Veronika. But also the fact that they can’t possibly screw it up any worse than the IOA did.”
“Hmm,” was all Sheppard said. The elevator chimed as it reached the surface. “Atlantis is amazing,” he said, sincerely. “You love it.” He paused, corrected himself. “You will love it.”
This made confusion settled over McKay’s features.
The doors slid apart, but Sheppard stayed against the back wall as McKay moved forward.
“Bye,” McKay muttered at him.
“Later,” Sheppard said. He waited until the doors began to move shut again. “Hey, Rodney!”
McKay paused, the elevator doors inching closer and closer together. “What?” he asked.
“Look underwater,” Sheppard said, softly.
“What?” asked McKay, in confusion. “What do you –” but his voice was drowned out by the elevator doors sliding shut and the ping as Sheppard hit the down button.
~
Sheppard found Teyla in the cafeteria, sitting alone with a cup of coffee. She looked tired. Maybe a little sad, but more tense and exhausted.
“Hi,” he said, coming to sit beside her.
“Did you say goodbye to your friend?” Teyla asked, trying for sincere.
“He’s not my friend,” Sheppard said. “He thinks I’m an asshole.”
Teyla gave a little shrug. “But you remember him.”
“Yeah,” Sheppard agreed. “Doesn’t really matter, though.” He waited, watched Teyla examine the inside of her coffee cup. “I’m sorry, Teyla,” he said.
“I am sorry, as well,” Teyla said, raising her eyes. “I did not…” she paused. “I did not expect this.”
“Me neither,” Sheppard said, genuinely. “I thought…I thought there’d be a way to get your husband back.” And get me home, he added silently.
“You are my husband,” Teyla said, immediately. Before he could speak, she went on. “When you fell, they told me that you would die. I did not expect to…I did not expect to ever be with you again.” She paused. “This is better.”
Sheppard didn’t say anything.
“I have lost a little,” Teyla continued. Her hands jerked on the table top like she wanted to touch him and was restraining herself. “You have lost more, I think.” She took a deep breath. “I understand that you want to make it right.”
“You do?”
Teyla nodded, but her eyes were beginning to glitter. “You must try,” she said. “I understand.”
Sheppard didn’t move. He put one hand down on the table, covering hers. Beneath his touch, he could feel her trembling.
“What’s with all the yellow?” he asked. “In our house.”
Teyla tilted her head and didn’t answer for a second. “It is the color of fertility,” she said, clearly.
“Oh,” Sheppard said, nodding. That made sense. “Okay.” He paused. “Will you speak to Ford and Lorne for me?” he asked.
“If I must,” Teyla answered.
Fair enough. “Tell ‘em,” Sheppard said, “and tell Landry, to look under the ocean. That’s where I’ll be.”
With the hand that wasn’t covering hers, he turned her face towards his. Her eyes were swimming with tears as he leaned his forehead in and touched it to hers.
Teyla pulled one hand free from his grasp, brought it up and cupped the back of his head, holding him against her tightly. Sheppard let her stay. He could feel the warmth of tears dripping down her face and landing on his neck.
Sheppard gently slipped out of her hold, taking her arm by the wrist and setting it back on the table top. He leaned in and kissed her, lightly, on the lips.
“I’ll see you at home,” he promised. “One way or the other.”
Teyla could have stopped him. She knew exactly what he intended. She could have screamed for help. Or, she could have physically stopped him from leaving the room. He wouldn’t have fought back, and even if he had, she still would have won.
“I will see you,” Teyla said, in return.
Sheppard rose and walked away. He didn’t look back. With purpose, he walked through the hall and took an elevator down to the labs where McKay, Carter, and Jackson had been working.
Miraculously, the room was unguarded. Security cameras would see him, sure, but no one would get here quickly enough to stop him. The device was still sitting on the floor, glowing a gentle green. No one had followed through yet with the General’s order to destroy it.
Sheppard walked up to it. Under the bright lights, it was easy to identify the circle at head level and the hands outlined above it. Sheppard raised his arms, bringing his palms down against the surface. He immediately felt the sparking jolts of electricity McKay had mentioned.
He didn’t stop.
Leaning forward, Sheppard pressed his forehead into the circle and closed his eyes.
He waited a second, the machine already tingling against his skin.
Then, with a thought, he turned it on and thought of home.
~ The End ~
~please feed the author~
